Wednesday, January 27, 2016

History will link me to Beavis

We're all trying to make a difference in the world, and sometimes I wonder what legacy I'll leave. I supposed I've helped shaped a few sixth grade minds, and that could have some a lasting impact. But if we're talking about how I've made my mark in American history, there's my IMDB page, of course, my top achievement to my inclusion in the Wikipedia pages for Beavis, Butt-Head, and Beavis and Butt-Head.

Once upon a time I was 21 and working at The Boston Phoenix fresh of college. It was the alternative paper dissed by Mark Ruffalo in Spotlight, and it's also where I met my awesome wife. My job was to type in concert listings, a task for which I was paid the tidy sum of $6.50/hour -- and I had to compete for a month to land the gig. Anything I wrote for the paper paid extra, so soon I was reviewing the Barney the Dinosaur movie for $60, doing comedy bits for $40 a pop. The holy grail was a real-live article.

I was young and hungry, and when the voice of my generation found itself at a series finale, I saw an opportunity. I pitched an article mourning the loss of Beavis and Butt-Head, and they realized this was the reason they'd hired a 21 year-old. Which meant my first big article included words like "fart," "fart-knocker," "turd-burglar," and "nihilism." Reading it now, I'm struck by how heavily my editor put his fingerprints on it, as well as my gross factual errors (this was pre-Youtube). But because this was years before an endless slew of blogs and webzines would cover every story to death, I was the only game in town. (A recurring theme for me.) And so I'm quoted on the wikipedia page.

From the show's page:
In 1997, Dan Tobin of The Boston Phoenix commented on the series' humor, stating that it transformed "stupidity into a crusade, forcing us to acknowledge how little it really takes to make us laugh."
From Butt-Head:
Dan Tobin of The Boston Phoenix described Butt-head as "ringleader, the devious visionary."
From Beavis:
Dan Tobin of The Boston Phoenix described Beavis as "the sidekick and follower" who developed into "more of a loose cannon".
I know that anyone can edit Wikipedia, but I swear it wasn't me who added these. Still, very neat.

And I can't find it now, but years ago I stumbled across a lawsuit about fire which blamed the show, and lawyers had twisted my descriptions so it sounded like I was criticizing them (when in reality, mine was a love letter). But that seems to have disappeared off the interwebs. Wikipedia, however, lives on. And my connection to the turd-burglars in question is etched in stone... until one of your logs into Wikipedia and deletes it.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

This blog is a teaching resource?

In certain teaching circles, this blog is kind of a big deal. To paraphrase what I said last summer:
Teachers in Massachusetts have to become certified in teaching English Language Learners. The state set up a course to cover this, but by all accounts it's a nightmare and a lot of work. So one workaround is to pass a teacher test on Sheltered English Immersion. And if the choice is to give up my Mondays all fall or spend half a summer half-studying in my hammock...
So I took (and passed) the test, but because I thought the provided study materials were WILDLY insufficient, the next day I decided to harness the power of the WORLD WIDE WEB and write a comprehensive blog post about what was on the test and my advice for preparing yourself. I had looked for prep materials, but because I was among the go this route, there was nothing out there. Yes, I was a trail-blazer! And my post became the only game in town. And soon my post went viral, or least teacher-viral.

At Back to School Night, a parent and colleague Arlington told me that in Arlington's test prep course, they had given out my blog post as a resource. I also heard this from a friend in Brookline, so I think it's only fair to assume every town in Massachusetts is using me as a resource. Maybe not, but if I'm to believe the comments thread (49 and counting), it is in fact aiding some people's studying.

So as is becoming a theme here, I have many claims to fame in life. I've told you about Vince Neil and Matt Hasselbeck, now we cover my contribution to the world of teaching. Maybe next time I'll tell you about the Wikipedia page for Beavis.

Wednesday, January 13, 2016

That Time I Went to Vince Neil's Birthday Party

Once upon a time, I worked on a television sitcom on the WB network. As I sometimes say: Not only did they cancel the show, the canceled the whole network! One of their hits was The Surreal Life, a reality show that dumped C-list celebs in a house to be weird. To do some cross-promotion, former Mötley Crüe frontman Vince Neil won a guest spot on our show, Greetings from Tucson. After the episode, he invited the whole stage crew to his birthday party.

A party thrown by someone from Mötley Crüe, one of the all-time hardest partying bands? Okay!

The party was thoroughly unwild, a little awkward, in a nice but unremarkable Hancock Park house. The good part it was jam-packed with C-list celebrities, and the ratio of celeb to civilian was pretty high.

In addition to Vince Neil, there was Gabrielle Carteris, aka Andrea Zuckerman from Beverly Hills, 90210; Jeri, a Survivor villain who was on minute 14:55 of her allotted 15; NBA rebound king/future honorary North Korean Dennis Rodman; a guy who was allegedly dating Priscilla Presley; and my ninth grade hero MC Hammer.  I stood next to Hammer as the cake came out for Vince Neil, and I wished like hell he'd start a conversation with me. I'd been in LA long enough to know it was wise of me not to corner him and breathlessly confess what "Turn This Mutha Out" once meant to me.

Nothing much happened at the party, but I had already had my Vince Neill moment earlier in the week. Jeff Garlin was booked as Vince's manager, but he wasn't able to make it to an early rehearsal, the table read where the cast reads the script at a table for the writers, network, studio, and staff. And because I'm awesome, they asked me to be Jeff Garlin at the table read.

So I ran lines with Vince Neil at the start of the week, and I went to his birthday party at the end of the week, and I'm not sure that he and I actually ever had a conversation. Hollywood!