Saturday, November 1, 2014

That time my hat blew under a subway car

I'm the Secretary of Education!
I'm a very important man!
It was the night I was coming back from purchasing elements of my Halloween costume. I had left the store thinking goth Willy Wonka, but on Halloween I just dressed funny and told people I was the secretary of education. "The real secretary of education doesn't dress like this," I'd admit to perplexed sixth graders. "His tie is much bigger." It was a good costume.

The clerk had laughed when he gave my tophat its own bag, and I had to admit I found it excellent. At the station, I put my backpack and two costume bags on the ground, and I waited for the train. When it arrived, the wind blew my hat bag several feet away. I ran after it, but it kept blowing farther down the platform. I was just a guy chasing his hat. But all the oncoming train could see was a guy running toward the tracks as a train was pulling into the station. So he honked at me. I stopped. And I watched as my hat blew onto the tracks and got run over by the Red Line train.

There goes $12, I thought. I figured I'd buy a replacement hat locally tomorrow. Frustrating, but not debilitating. When the train left, I went to survey the damage. And the hat was fine! I had also purchased a cane, so I laid on the ground and used it to tap the hat into the bag, then catch a handle and lift it up. The hat was fine! I gave a thumbs up to the guy who'd watched the whole thing unfold, then clipped the hat bag onto my backpack and got back to doing a crossword puzzle on my phone.

It's not easy being the secretary of education.

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